John and Julia were at odds. And as they sat in the counseling room, she had a long list of complaints about him not being loving, and when I turned to him it was the same. Neither felt loved by the other. I asked him if he knew what Julia’s love language was and he looked at me like I was speaking Greek. I asked Julia the same question and she said she had no clue either. They had been married for five years. So then I went on to explain to them that the best way to communicate love to each other is in the way that they receive love. Gary Chapman writes about this in his book, “The Five Love Languages.” In it he identifies the five most common ways people are wired to feel loved through, words, quality time,.........